📅 Thought for today:
‘People often judge themselves according to whether others find them acceptable or wanting.’
— Janet Tolan
#thoughtfortoday #locus #evaluation #carlrogers #judgement #expectation #MotheringSunday
This is not a mainstream quote, it is actually taken from a Psychotherapy textbook.
Carl Rogers called this an external locus of evaluation.
When we don’t trust our own instincts and sense of what is right for us.
We consider what others think and form an evaluation (judgement) of ourselves based on other people’s opinions (as we think they will be, rather than know them to be).
Whilst it is generally true that a therapist will most often see anxiety, depression, and stress, there is a strong element of this worrying about what other people think of us.
When someone says they are a “people pleaser” we can see this in action.
It is not easy to live in modern society without this external locus, and social media actively encourages (what do you suppose “likes” are all about?).
I’m revisiting this topic (doing some re-reading) and enjoying looking anew at something a learned a few years ago.
Just a quick thirty minutes this morning.
Happy Mothering Sunday to all mothers reading this, you can thank Anna Jarvis for the modern version of Laetare Sunday.